Sunday, August 7, 2016

Update on Mom

I need to get better at blogging for sure and I thank one of my fellow bloggers for asking me about my Mom. 

Since my post “Aging Parents” she has had her surgery and the results were really good! The surgeons say they were able to remove all of her tumor so of course we want to hope that is the case. I’m afraid I don’t have a whole lot of faith in cancer leaving when it is asked to. I hope I’m wrong this time.

Mom was out of surgery and into recover within 5 hours. Unfortunately, her dementia kept her from even remembering what she had been through and with the pain of her incision she still thought they needed to ‘get that thing out’. It was difficult to see her so uncomfortable  for the preceding weeks/months of her surgery and it broke my heart the first time seeing her the day after. I know I was expecting too much. Bill keeps reminding me that she still had us laughing with her drug induced stories even though she didn't really know we were there.

I knew I had to go up again before our trip to Michigan on Monday.

When I went back up to see her with my daughter, Bridgette and grandson, Jake, she was a totally different person. We were thrilled to find her able to carry on a conversation of sorts, even though it was the same thing over and over. She recognized my daughter right away and me after a second go at it. I don't blame her at all for mixing me up with one of my sisters, there are 6 of us after all!

Her tubes, catheter and intravenus have been removed now and she is eating on her own, although very sporadically right now. We hope her appetite improves when she is home so she can gain some energy and weight back again. Hopefully she will be discharged within the next few days. We will have someone in place to stay with her for the time period that her dressings are still in place. She has a habit of removing things like that if she is unattended. 

Once again, thank you all for your words of support regarding my mom and I apologize for dallying on this update.


  1. It is so hard to see our aging parents go this good luck with here recovery.

    1. Thank you George. It is very hard indeed, remembering how strong they once were, running a hectic household.

  2. I am really really thankful I came across this post. My mother is going into surgery on the 17th and I am worried about the surgery itself on a woman her age as well as the care needed afterwards and how quickly she will heal. THERE IS SO MUCH that I worry about when it comes to my mother getting older. The more I research the subject the more I find that I need to plan and think about. I think planning and being prepared is the most important thing during this trying time. My one main resource and recommendation to you is the book “9 Realities Of Caring For An Elderly Parent” by Stefania Shaffer. The book is a personalized look at what the author had to go through when moving in with her mother during her final years and all the problems she faced and the best way to remedy them. She covers organizing doctor visits and keeping on top of medication; financial planning; nutrition; physical therapy; and even family dynamics during such a trying time.. This book covers everything in a really moving and inspiring way. I can’t recommend it enough —
    Happy your mom is on the road to recovery!

  3. Thank you for your heart warming note, Deborah. You probably went back to my previous post and discovered that Mom is 90 and has dementia. We, a family of 6 daughters and 1 brother left, were quite skeptical about a surgery but the surgeon had no such concerns. This surprised us but he said since she had no other health issues other than having a pacemaker inserted in 2007 and it was only used 5 times in 9 years. Mom is a small person now, just under 120 lb. and wouldn't eat or drink hardly anything. We can only hope that this changes now that she does not have a tumor taking all of her blood. She's had at least 10 transfusions over the past 2 years so now we know why! I'm sending prayers your way for your mom that everything works out for the best.Like you, we were all prepared for the worst, saying silent goodbyes the night before. Thanks for writing!